       
Solitary refinement
Barbara Yost
The Arizona Republic
July 16, 2002 12:00:00
Friday is "office day" for Linda Herold, when she holes up in her
Scottsdale home office as publisher of the Herold Report, an
online newsletter for businesswomen. She breaks only for lunch.
Most Fridays she lunches alone at nearby Galileo Bread Emporio, a
bistro where she feels comfortable eating by herself while reading
her mail. Even on the road, Herold is used to eating alone.
"I look at it as an adventure," says Herold, who coordinates
Women of Scottsdale, a social and networking organization. "When
you're traveling, it's an opportunity to try new things."
A decade ago, Herold might not have been so enthusiastic. Before
women entered business in great numbers, the single female usually
found herself ushered to a table behind the potted palm next to the
bathroom. Room service was the recommended way to dine.
But as the number of female business travelers boomed, restaurant
owners found they couldn't ignore the numbers of customers who might
dine alone one week and bring back a dozen colleagues the next.
Since 1980, the percentage of female business travelers has soared
from 1 percent to 40 percent of the total business travelers. Now
many restaurants court single diners.
"It's been wonderful to nurture that market," says Mark Tarbell,
owner of Tarbell's in Phoenix. Until recently, he says, single
diners were a "foreign experience" for restaurateurs accustomed to
romantic couples, families and large business groups.
Women meekly accepted their status. No more.
"They realized they did not have to be relegated to the back of
the room," says Cindy White, owner of Estelle Inc., a Valley company
that designs and manufactures woven ribbon sweaters. White travels
monthly on business, and says, "I love eating out."
'Stepping forward'
She accepts no bad tables. If she finds herself led to the back,
she politely asks for a better table.
There's even a Web site for solo women diners, offering tipping
advice, a guide to making reservations and solo-friendly eateries
nationwide.
"Everything is changing," says Marya Charles Alexander of
Southern California, publisher of solodining.com. "Solo diners are
stepping forward. There are a lot of hungry solo diners out there."
While solo men, too, have felt the sting of neglect in
restaurants, it's women who traditionally were expected to be
neither seen nor heard in America's dining rooms. About six years
ago, Alexander appeared on a radio talk show when a listener shared
an anecdote. Traveling on business, she phoned her hotel's
restaurant for a reservation and was told bluntly, "Have you thought
about room service?"
When the maitre d' repeated the suggestion, she shrank into her
room and took his advice.
"I don't think that would happen today," says Alexander, who
admits she had to teach herself to eat alone after her divorce. On
her first attempt, she fled the restaurant before being seated,
despite the management's hospitality.
Welcome signs
Single diners can still feel unwelcome, Alexander says. But most
restaurants embrace them, with some even courting singles with the
promise of a free appetizer. Commander's Palace in New Orleans gives
solos a free drink.
Other clues that singles are savored: A broad selection of wines
by the glass, wait staff who don't shout "only one?" at the front
door and communal tables where strangers can dine together.
The latter are an option for diners who travel single but enjoy
dinner partners. Today such restaurants as the Border Grill in Santa
Monica, Calif., and Asia de Cuba in New York and Los Angeles promote
their communal tables. At Red Sage in Washington, D.C., chefs
perform their duties at small dining counters where solo guests are
introduced to each other.
Although the Valley has not jumped on the communal-table trend,
Alexander recommends several restaurants where it's chic to eat
alone: Tarbell's, RoxSand, Christopher's Fermier Brasserie and
Paola's Wine Bar, and Vincent on Camelback. Of Vincent's, she says,
"Local solos love to do lunch there."
Solo options
Other friendly places for singles are sushi bars and brew pubs,
says David Rothschild, director of the Culinary Arts Program at
Phoenix's Metro Tech High School and author of The Main Course on
Table Service, a training manual for servers. Rothschild urges
restaurant management to welcome solo business travelers and assign
their best servers to tables for one.
"They're on expense accounts, and they have money to spend," he
points out.
At RoxSand in Phoenix, chef-owner RoxSand Scocos trains her staff
to treat all customers alike, whether they're alone or with a crowd,
says manager Matthew Arnold.
"I embrace it. I love it," Arnold says of his growing clientele
of businesswomen. He reserves a table for one that's discreet yet
comfortable. "No one gets stuck behind a potted palm."
While singles don't want to dine in the hallway, they don't want
to be conspicuous either, Rothschild says. They might prefer sitting
against the wall or in a corner. Single diners often bring books,
laptop computers or paperwork, a practice acceptable even in upscale
restaurants.
And what about that old notion that women are notoriously poor
tippers? Herold debunks the myth, believing women are in sympathy
with servers.
"In the old days, people thought women didn't tip well," she
says. "I don't think women ever tipped badly. They know how much
work it is."
Reach the reporter at
(602) 444-8597.
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