Thursday, October 10, 2002

A story released today by Out in America reports that "Donna", "Sue", and Donna's nine-year-old son "Chad" meet the first definition of a family in Webster's Dictionary, but they don't meet the criteria required by some St. Louis suburbs.

This past summer, the couple fell in love with a house in Ladue, and made plans to buy it. The home was close to shopping and other conveniences, and near Reed Elementary, the school they wanted Chad to attend. "It was a perfect location, or so we thought," said Donna.

Then, their realtor warned them that Ladue has an ordinance prohibiting more than two people unrelated by blood, marriage, or adoption from living together. That information left the couple with a lot of questions. It was turning into a logistical quagmire with unknown implications, so Donna began calling Ladue city officials.

Donna said the sergeant on duty at the Ladue Police Department told her their household would not fulfill the city's requirements, that cohabitation is not allowed. But City Hall said that to deny their family's legitimacy would be a civil rights violation, and that as long as there were fewer than three unrelated people, they would be fine.

In the end, Donna and Sue decided not to buy the house in Ladue, but instead, bought a home in Clayton, which allows for up to four unrelated persons in a household. The conflicting information they received from Ladue city officials cinched their decision. "Who wants to live where the police don't even think you have a right to be there?" Donna asked.

As it turns out, the couple made the right decision. While it's okay for gay and lesbian couples, and even families with one child to live in Ladue, if you have two kids, Ladue apparently rolls up the welcome mat.

Ladue City Clerk Mike Wooldridge clarified the city's ordinance. He said that if an unmarried man and woman, with one child could live in Ladue and each of them had a child it would be acceptable to live with each other.

But when asked if two women who considered themselves a couple, who each had a child, could live there, Wooldridge said, "under our ordinance, they would not be allowed to do that."
According to Wooldridge, the penalty for violating Ladue's ordinance is a maximum fine of $500. That, and the expense of relocating, unless you're an opposite-sex couple with the privelege of getting married.

Webster Groves and Valley Park have ordinances similar to Ladue's, but the way they interpret those rules gives families with gay and lesbian parents a fair shake. According to Webster Groves' Director of Planning and Development Roger Grow, two unmarried people, one with one child, and one with two children, could live together. What if the couple were two men or two women? "Sexual orientation is not an issue," Grow added.

Valley Park Building Commisisoner John Boggs clarified the issue best. That municipality defines a family as "an individual or married couple and children thereof, and not more than two other persons related directly to the individual or married couple..." Two women with two children would be the same as a man and a woman with in a similar household, Boggs explained, and added, "As long as everybody in the household is related to somebody, that's all that matters."